Thursday, February 02, 2006

Crotch Rot

posted by Majestic Ape at 6:21 PM

So, the guy, on the bridge. He approaches me. Its dark. Its cold. He looks creepy. I look creepy.

He speaks first.

"Are you a crotch rot or a fetus face?" he asks tentatively.

"Hmmm..." I'm not really sure how to respond. After all, I have eyebrows, so I'm not really a fetus face. And I'm not harboring any yeasts or fungal infections so I'm not really a crotch rot either. But he seems like he could be interesting and I don't want to alienate him right off the bat so I just say "Both, I guess. How bout you?"

"Neither. You want to go forage for some wild lettuce saxifrage in rock creek park? You look like a forager," he states.

I am familiar with this lettuce saxifrage. I am dedicated to feasting free on wild edibles and this is one of my favorite wild salad greens. Even though its dark, we head for the park.

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