How to Have Fun with Your Favorite Junkie
posted by Majestic Ape at 8:24 AM
How to Have Fun With The Family Junkie
1. Steal his shit first
2. Hide the spoons
3. Switch his brown chewy lump with clustered snake turds
4. Rat on his dealer
5. Write on his face with a sharpie when he's nodding
6. Dip his needles in pee- pee
7. Put tacks on the bathroom floor just before he vomits
8. Tell him his poetry sucks
9. Change the locks and bar the windows, this time for real!
10. Put him in a straightjacket to induce withdrawl and pump and pump a Tammy Faye Baker sermon through the speakers at full blast.
1. Steal his shit first
2. Hide the spoons
3. Switch his brown chewy lump with clustered snake turds
4. Rat on his dealer
5. Write on his face with a sharpie when he's nodding
6. Dip his needles in pee- pee
7. Put tacks on the bathroom floor just before he vomits
8. Tell him his poetry sucks
9. Change the locks and bar the windows, this time for real!
10. Put him in a straightjacket to induce withdrawl and pump and pump a Tammy Faye Baker sermon through the speakers at full blast.
Labels: addiction, Apes, drugs, heroin, Paris Hilton, the apes